Want to learn programming but can't choose which language to learn? Can't choose a course? Well, you're at the right place! This class will introduce you to the art of programming using an approach inspired by MIT's old course 6.001 and the companion textbook Structure and Interpretation of Computer Programs (SICP). Despite its age, the book is still highly relevant and is even regarded as the best textbook on programming by some. This class is the Purist's (somewhat opinionated) Introduction to Programming. We use a minimal yet highly expressive language called Scheme to teach you essential ideas in programming that can be transferred to any other languages. We emphasize the functional programming paradigm from the very start, and you will become fully comfortable with the oh-so-scary recursion. (Arguably, the way programming is taught nowadays makes it harder for students to grasp those so-called "advanced" concepts; they are actually quite primitive and intuitive if viewed from the correct angle.) Given the time constraints, we expect to cover parts of the first three chapters of SICP at a relatively shallow but hopefully still insightful and applicable level. This class should prepare students for further focused study on introductry programming. We hope this class is enlightening for both students who are completely new to programming and students with prior experience. Supplementary exercises are provided for students who want to dive deeper.