A brief survey of ancient Roman history from the Regal Period to the fall of the Empire through compelling narratives, with a special attention to the stranger stories. Come learn about deadly figs, collapsible boats, political manipulation, civil wars, insane emperors, and well-honored horses. This course will also equip its students with the necessary responses in case they are ever trapped in an awkward yet deadly conversation with a deranged emperor. Note: some raunchy yet historical material may not be suitable for younger grades.